Fetch85
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Re:Electro!!! - 2006/06/08 10:59
Stan`s prediction concerning electro: It will continue to rise in popularity, eventually consuming the "lounge" movement and stop just short of "progressive house." Clubs will begin to ramp up dresscodes until a kitsch posh revival begins, incorporating the more clever elements of 80s fashion. Crimped hair will return in less than two years. Soft porn will receive some critical attention, morphing into post-modern romantic criticism, tongue firmly planted in cheek. The movement will become boring again after approximately 18 months, but businesses--having altered their format to accommodate the new trend--will try to stretch it out for almost three years. Felix da Housecat and, more importantly, Miss Kitten, will be hunted by the pop police and turned into stars *just* after the genre has ceased innovating. Felix will refuse. Miss Kitten, unsure of where to turn after phrases like "lick my ass" have become post-vogue, will succumb to the celebrity fascism of MTV, to be thrown back in our faces for years to come, long after people have once again stopped crimping their hair. And after electro, the next big thing will be a blue-collar uprising. Something similar to punk in its social aggressiveness, but with a more patriotic flair. The instruments will be played by hand, not by computers, but the electronic structure of build-break-build will have permanently etched itself into the repertoire of songwriters, almost overtaking the verse-chorus structure. They will call the new genre, "Creative". Somehow the implication that all that came before was *not* creative will fail to be commonly understood. Cats will hate it, dogs will love it. Being a rebound genre, it will last barely six months. Then, Britney will release a new album. She will have finally become the goddess that she has dreamt of becoming since a strange vision she had in her uncle`s field under a maple tree when she was twelve. With her music, she will influence politicians and religious leaders alike. On October 3rd, 2007, she will begin to unmake the world and refashion it to her particular liking. By 2015, the world will call her queen.
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